I am thankful

Ten years ago, I spent Thanksgiving in a flooded tent in Kuwait. This year, I am thankful I am not spending Thanksgiving in a flooded tent in Kuwait.

I have so much to be thankful for this year and every year.

I am writing this from Hotel Capstone on the campus of the University of Alabama. I am thankful I am only here overnight, because I felt safer in Iraq.

I am thankful for Alabama fans. They make me feel better about myself.

I am thankful for my mother and brother, even though they’re Alabama fans.

I am thankful I know the difference in they’re, there, and their.

I am thankful for lucky 73 yard touchdown passes on 4th and 18.

Auburn’s Ricardo Louis (5) made a stunning 73-yard TD catch to beat Georgia. (Shanna Lockwood/USA Today Sports)

Auburn’s Ricardo Louis (5) made a stunning 73-yard TD catch to beat Georgia. (Shanna Lockwood/USA Today Sports)

I am thankful Auburn didn’t lose to a team from Mississippi this year.

I am thankful I know the difference in lose and loose.

I am thankful for this double chin, because it means I’ve been eating well.

I am thankful for a dog that wakes me each day at the crack of dawn with a bony elbow in my chest.

My sweet Ruby loves to lay on my chest...

My sweet Ruby loves to lay on my chest…

I am thankful for Google. Try it. You’ll be amazed and what you can learn and what you won’t have to ask others.

I am thankful for toothpaste, mouthwash, and Tic Tacs. If you are unfamiliar with any of these products, please Google.

I am thankful for Q-tips. Very few things in this world are as unappealing as a dirty ear canal. Friends don’t let friends walk around with dirty ear canals.

I am thankful for my nose hair trimmer. Now that texting is illegal, it gives me something to do while driving.

I am thankful for baths that allow me to soak away my worries even if only temporarily.

I am thankful for a dog that jumps in the bathtub while the water is still running to ensure the water is at a safe temperature for me to soak away my aforementioned worries.

Video of Ruby testing my bathwater…

I am thankful for your kids.

I am thankful I know the difference in your and you’re.

I am thankful for a dryer that can be restarted over and over so I don’t have to iron.

I am thankful I don’t keep up with the Kardashians.

I am thankful for my uniqueness.

I am thankful for fresh white bread and cold milk, because without either, I’d have no use for peanut butter or jelly.

I am thankful to have a vehicle that does not require Duct Tape. Been there. Done that.

I am thankful for a dog that immediately cleans my floor of any and all stumbling hazards, otherwise known as food.

I am very thankful for high definition television. I can no longer lower myself to watch standard definition, although it was just fine the first 39 years of my life.

I am thankful that I haven’t bitten my fingernails in over 20 years. It makes scratching so much more pleasurable than before.

I am thankful I know the difference in than and then.

I am thankful for a dog that brings in worms, spiders, centipedes, leaves, shrubbery and clumps of dirt so that I am able to get maximum use out of my “high dolla” vacuum cleaner.

I am thankful for XM radio so I don’t have to listen to local car dealership commercials. I don’t care if they are “selling cars like candy bars or trucks like Reese’s Cups.”

I am thankful for soft toilet paper. Being an Army guy, I’ve used enough John Wayne toilet paper to last a lifetime.

I am thankful for a dog that turns down the covers each night before I crawl into bed before settling down right on top of my pillow.

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I am thankful to our Veterans who have served this nation so honorably.

I am thankful for unanswered prayers. Otherwise, I might be in my 12th year of selling furniture in Montgomery.

I am thankful I get to do what I love for a living.

I am thankful I have the opportunity to write for a great local newspaper.

I have so much to be thankful for, but most importantly, I am incredibly thankful for my faith, family, and friends and, last but certainly not least, I am thankful for my dog.

If she only knew she was a dog…

Jody Fuller is a comic, speaker, writer and soldier with three tours of duty in Iraq. He is also a lifetime stutterer. He can be reached at jody@jodyfuller.com. For more information, please visit http://www.jodyfuller.com.

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14 thoughts on “I am thankful

  1. Love it, but you misspelled Reese’s cups.

  2. I love this! You do have so much to be thankful for! And I also love that your comedic talent never fails you! You always make me smile and giggle! So thank you for being you Jody! I pray you have a great holiday season! So just incase I don’t say it later, Happy Thanksgiving & Merry Christmas to you and Miss Ruby!

  3. I’m thankful that I have the pleasure of reading your womderful stories.

  4. Great list! We are thankful for YOU and for ALL Veterans and Active Duty Military!

  5. Very nice Jody! Thank you for sharing your gift of writing and humor.

  6. Love your articles Jody! And love you have sweet Ruby 🙂

  7. Wow!!! You said it all!! Happy thanksgiving! Oh yeah and Waaaaaaaarrrrrrrr Eagle!!! R u ready for some foooootttttttballlll:)

  8. Very funny and wise – except now you are going to be un-thankful when FSU spanks the Tigers!

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